DELDOT’s Final Plan For The 5 Points Intersection

The 5 points intersection has been a cluster @%&% for a long time and DELDOT has been working on proposals to fix the intersection from the ninth level of hell. After careful planning and public comments it was decided to just do everything suggested.

The new intersection will be called 50 points and will take you to all points north, south, east and west. No more sitting in long lines of traffic waiting your turn, now you can just drive around for hours and hours looking for your exit. Construction is expected to start on Memorial Day weekend and be completed in 3021, or next week, whichever comes first.

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Locals will love the fact that most of the tourists will just be stuck in traffic for hours since there won’t be any signage for the exits. “If you don’t know where you are going you shouldn’t be on the road anyway” said a DELDOT spokesman. “We wanted to accommodate all the suggestions at the public workshops no matter how outrageous. There will also be a Wawa and Royal Farms in the center with only one entrance, Patrons will get extra points for running each other down in the parking lot. The main thoroughfare will also have a bike lane in the center of the road”

Tune in next week when DELDOT puts a roundabout at the route 1 and 24 intersection.

We hope you have a wonderful April Fools Day, because we are

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